Tales of an Anxious Soul

Dear Everybody, I realize that in my last post, I did not give the necessary credit to my parents. This process has been very emotional, and a big learning experience for my whole family and I. My parents I have learned are my biggest cheerleaders. I should have known that before, but due to my own stubborn way of thinking and over analyzing I thought they wouldn't like the idea of me being so open about these struggles. I couldn't have been further from the truth. I had an amazing conversation with each of them separately yesterday and was able to explain why I had those uncertain thoughts before. I seriously could not have asked for better parents. Sure this is a lot for them to wrap their minds around. They have their own emotions they have to go through and figure out as do I with my emotions. They as parents naturally think of ways they could have prevented various things from happening and ways they could have protected me from people at school, my negative thoughts,...

I am new to this whole blogging concept but I don't know any other way to get my thoughts across clearly. As many of you may know, I am currently and have been for a while now preparing to serve an LDS mission. whether that's a service mission or a full time mission it doesn't matter. It's a mission no matter what. It has been an interesting journey for sure. When I first began seriously considering serving a mission I had expressed past feelings of anxiety, depression,  and yes some minor self infliction as well as using substances to numb the pain. While these things at the time were somewhat under control I was directed to LDS family services, to go through some assessments to see if I was in the position to be away for a whole two years. After taking a series of tests. I met with the counselor and we discussed it may be best if I wait a little bit and perhaps move out of my parents house so I could work on managing my stress and anxiety levels. I'm going to b...